Hold Me Never (Holding Never) by Natalie Kristen

Author:Natalie Kristen [Kristen, Natalie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2013-08-22T05:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER ELEVEN

I wake up in my cell, on my mattress. Shielding my eyes from the glare of the naked bulb buzzing overhead, I push myself up and stare groggily around. Those tiny brown cloths are back around my breasts and hips, protecting my modesty in the most immodest way.

My head is pounding madly, like there's something trying to tear out of my skull. A fractured memory perhaps.

The cell is completely empty and silent. I turn to look at Hani's empty mattress in the corner. There is a tray of food at the door. One tray. Not two.

I drag the tray and myself to the corner of Hani's mattress and close my eyes. When did I last see her? It was in the Great Hall. With all that wine and blood and...sex. The night, that nightmarish night, seems so recent yet so distant. I seem to have lost track of time. Was it just last night, or many nights ago?

There was blood. I can remember the blood, lots of it. And there was sex. With a dead man.

Flickering images of leering lips, heaving breasts, scarred backs, grasping hands, probing tongues and fingers, erect penises flash in rapid succession behind my eyelids. The images are stark, raw, and too real to be imagined. I clutch my head between my hands, squeezing my eyes shut.

I know something happened after we left the Great Hall. But what? Why can't I seem to remember?

I stare down at the red bite mark on the inside of my thigh. And in that moment, everything comes rushing back, the memories of the night before surging through my mind in a numbing, terrifying wave.

I double over and retch violently.

I see those black candles, the gruesome statues, the Empress on the bed, Owen...I see their writhing, fornicating bodies, thrusting and undulating in torment and ecstasy.

That ugly throbbing mark on my thigh—he left his mark on me, as a reminder of what he did to me. He used me to get himself hard for the Empress. He fucked me with his tongue, and he would have fucked me with his cock as well, if the Empress hadn't forbidden him to touch me with what was hers.

He would have taken me, right there and then, if not for the threat hanging over his head. Taken my virginity, for himself, against my will. Deflowered and defiled me forever.

I remember how he collapsed after satisfying the Empress. He had been taken and broken as well. And he would do the very same thing to me, take me and break me. I pity him, and I despise him.

I remember Dr. Rolin coming into the Empress's chambers with a metal briefcase. The doctor had walked up to me without a word and released me from the clamps and restraints. My eyes could close at last, but instead of shutting out the horrors of the night, I'd just kept on staring at the doctor. I knew that he wasn't here to save me. When he snapped his

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